Welcome, Gentle Reader, to my Blogiversary Extravaganza! We have some very special surprises today. First of all, look under your chair – did you find the keys to a BRAND NEW CAR?
I hope not, because I didn’t break into your house. I respect you too much, Gentle Reader – you come here, and read my humble little offerings. My cocktail party stories, my anecdotes, my triumphs and my tribulations – they’re all for you. Thank you for reading.
You may have noticed a few changes about the site. They’re all over. Explore them, enjoy them. I’ve also laboriously gone through all my old posts, adding photos, adding jokes, making early entries fit the style we’ve grown into together. There are a few easter eggs hidden in those old posts, actually – I would tell you, because I think they’re hilarious, but it’ll be better if you find them for yourself.
So what does a Blogiversary Extravaganza entail, if I’m not giving stuff away? Um. This?
Do you remember all the wonderful times we’ve had together, Gentle Reader? You were there with me while I rode that camel, and again in the haunted castle; you’ve been with me at plays, soirees, and seances. I even felt close enough to you to share my beauty secrets – and my indiscretions! We’ve had some wonderful conversations.
But it hasn’t been all skittles and beer, talking about Tylers One through Four and making music videos. No! Who could forget the drama this fall, when Sally Mae the Troll found a post I’d made last January, and made impertinent claims of insider knowledge of my family? Or how I had to neglect my blog for a month or two, after my roommates and I were forced from our home at gunpoint? Thank Providence for the silly little posts, the ones that don’t tell a story and are just sort of bizarre, and contain gems like these, to make us feel better about all that drama:
Honestly, Gentle Reader, I never thought I would become this obsessed with blogging. Truthfully, today’s post isn’t about a Whimsical Adventure – it is a Whimsical Adventure. Over the last year of blogging, I’ve met some wonderful people full of excellent advice –
– I wandered through the wilderness until I found a path; I have battled strange and angry creatures (Hi again, Sally Mae!); I have found both heroes and followers of my own, and like all who travel the Hero’s Circle, I have learned a lot about myself.
I even, with your help, Gentle Reader, published a book (available here for puchase, yo).
Thank you for all your love and support, Readers. I love you, too. Even Sally Mae. And you know what, Reader? This is your day too! I’d love to hear what you want to see more of – shall we bring back Music Monday? I want to know what you want less of – shall we nix the Poetic Interludes? Do you like the site redesign? Loathe it? Want more guest posts, or for me to link to you? Let me know. With your feedback, we might just make it through Year the Second – together.
And now, for your pleasure, a couple of interesting things from behind the scenes here (I left them until the end, because you might not find them as interesting as I did):
Judging from the search results and most popular posts, I guess your ideal post from me would involve a whimsical husband having an adventure with the gay ghost of Amanda Palmer’s bust, but the implications of that are a little worrying. How about the top search terms bringing people here, instead?
- Amanda Palmer’s Tits
- Ladies Masturbating (???)
- Lavender Marriage
- Ghosts Carrying a Chair
- Antique Victorian Medical Wimshurst Machine
- Jazz Age Castration
- Tyler J. Yoder
- How to Deal with Whimsical Husband
- Whimsical Camel
- Fucking a Reverend Sister (Really, people?)
- Whimsical Names for a Dance
- Vomiting Undigested Unchewed Food
There are also some truly spectacular spam comments from over the past year. Some of my favorites – none of them are remotely relevant to what I’ve written.
- Boil 1 to two leaves and make a tea when anguish sets in.
- I felt extremely ashamed to state, ‘I possess the background and also the education, but however below I am at 260 lbs,’ she mentioned. “I was such as the hairdresser who doesn’t have excellent hair.”
- The “incorrigible leech” moved in to the property over the assets, residing rentfree right until 2009.
- Mike Keibler was incredible at present. He is just a little dude and he performs ideal subject for us.